If you own the morning, you own the day.  We know this right Sample?

However, for so many of us, mornings are the worst.  I mean THE WORST! They are time restricted, task heavy and just not fun.

Here is what my morning looked like before - see if you can relate:

4.50am my husband leaves for work - he crashes around like an elephant and wakes everyone up.

5.30pm - my 3 boys are fighting.  Not a play fight either... legit trying to kill each other.  I resentfully get out of bed and break up 'fight club'

What follows for the next 2.5 hours, isn't pretty. I try, very much in vain, to tame these wild animals, feed them and do all the things that they need to do to leave the house.  We forget things like library bags, notes, books, homework. The kids scream at me. My ADHD boy is so overstimulated that he starts hitting himself and hurting his brothers. My youngest, sensory processing child resists wearing shoes, underpants and the seatbelt.  My voice is strained from yelling. I hate this. My house looks like an explosion has gone off. I drop the kids to school and think "few I made it". I go to work exhausted, feeling like I have already done a full day.

This went on for years.  Then I got very unwell. I got diagnosed with a very serious autoimmune disease that attacks healthy joint tissue.  It is very much triggered by stress. If I didn't find a way to decrease my stress - I was going to be in a whole lot of trouble and fast.

So as you heard yesterday, I called on my corporate background and started looking at my house like a CEO would look at a company.  I analysed all the weak areas, all the parts that were stressful and started creating procedures to make these times more efficient.  I wanted the boys to think of me as a fun mum. I wanted to have time for fun.  

So here are 3 simple tips for owning the morning:

1. Get up before your kids. My kids usually wake up between 5.00-6am.  But they have a little 'hatching time' where they watch TV while the sun starts to come up.

I get up before them.  I tip toe out to the kitchen and make myself a cup of tea.  While the kettle is boiling, I drink a really big glass of water, then I sit and watch that sun peaking its beautiful head over the valley.  It is such a wonderful time of day. I then do a quick 5 minute morning meditation, have a shower and use any extra time to work on something that I want to do.  That time is mine. Then when it is time to switch into heaving duty mumming, I have a full cup and can take whatever intensity they throw at me.

You see, if you wake up and start the day to your kids fighting, you are starting the day on the defensive.  It is very hard to get ahead of the day from that point. If you start the day before your kids, you are starting the day on the offensive and you have a head start on the day.  It makes you feel calmer, more in control and you are less likely to lose your sh*t.

If for some reason, mornings don't work for you (shift work, newborn baby etc) you need to carve out this time at a time that does work for you.

2. Do what you can the night before

Mornings are an intense time.  There is time pressure and it is often where meltdowns occur.  So get your stuff together the night before, spend 10 mins packing the lunches, filling drink bottles, checking the calendar, packing school bags, what do you need for tomorrow?  Lay out your own clothes. Get it ready. What you do the night before counts. It streamlines the morning and makes it run smoothly. So if your child has a meltdown you have the time to handle it.

3. Have an awesome morning routine for yourself and your kids

Here is where people go seriously wrong.  They make a pretty morning routine chart for the kids and stick it on the fridge.  After a few days, no one looks at it. In fact, after a while it is just an irritating reminder of all the things your child isn't doing.

A routine chart is serious business.  How it is set up, how it is timed, what happens before, during and after are all important.  The whole family needs to get in sync if you expect your ADHD child to be able to follow it independently.  I take this art form very seriously. I have even choreographed my boys routines so they are not in the same room, doing their tasks at the same times because it minimises conflict.  I also have my own routine that is synchronised with what my boys are doing. It has wiggle room, but honestly it makes for such a happier morning. We do the boring admin life stuff as quickly as possible.  Then we have time for fun. Remember we are raising our children to be functional adults. I want to teach my boys to get the boring stuff done, effectively and efficiently so they have time for the good stuff.

I want you to have a look at a problem time that your family experiences.  Is it the morning like me? Or is there another time of the day that is very stressful.  How can we improve this for you? How can you give your kids the skills to better manage this time?

Keep me updated.  I love hearing from all the beautiful members of this community.  We are all here to support each other.

Our spectacular 6 week online course that sets all this up for you and so much more closes in just 9 days.  So if you are thinking about working with me - jump on it so you don't miss out.

Here are some testimonials:

Such practical advice from someone with skin in the game - I am finding the Calming the Chaos course great value for money with really useful information and steps to put into practice (and I have tried a lot of different resources so far). Sharon really gets it and is a wonderful encouragement - Thank you! - Juliet

Finding Calming the Chaos Program has impacted our whole family to come united in smoothing out our structures, roles and responsibilities and given us further insight to what our boy needs. A beautiful supportive perspective from someone who walks this same journey is one who you want in your corner. Sharon is real, compassionate, knowledgeable and such a beautiful person to connect with everyday. - Nicole