Episode 77: Should I Medicate My Child? What ADHD Parents Need to Know Before Deciding
Once your child has a diagnosis of ADHD, I bet you were pretty freaked out about the whole medication thing. I certainly was, right? Our pediatrician presented it, our teacher was kind of pushing for it, our family was very against it, and it was just, there was just a whole lot of emotion and fear and chaos around the medication question.
If you're a parent that's navigating this right now, I just want to acknowledge that this is a really tricky decision. There's always these thoughts that run through your head. Like, what if I'm numbing my child? What if, what if it changes who they are? What if I'm taking the easy way out? What if I do it and it's the wrong choice? What if I don't do it and it's the wrong choice? So in this episode, I'm not going to tell you what to do. I'm going to tell you a little bit about my experience.
and give you some practical tools to help decide what's right for your family. Let's go. Firstly, before we get started, I want to acknowledge that I am not a medically trained professional. I am a PCC credentialed ADHD coach that supported so many, so many families. But this episode is based on my own research and my own family story. I'm not going to tell you whether you should medicate your child. I am not trained in medication and I advise you to seek
support from a professional like a developmental pediatrician or a child psychiatrist. You need to do your own research and feel confident in your decision for your family. There is no one right answer when it comes to medication and your child. So let's talk about my own family's journey. When my first son was diagnosed with ADHD, I, it was no surprise. I knew it was coming because he's exactly the same as my husband, super hyperactive in profile.
And it was no shock to me. Our son's teacher at the time had really been hinting quite strongly, probably a little bit too strongly that we needed to go down the diagnosis pathway and also needed to consider medication if he was going to be in a position to access school. And we were on the wait list. We finally got in, we got the diagnosis. It was nothing that we didn't expect.
And then we were faced with the decision of whether to put our child on medication or not. Now we made the decision as a family to try everything else first. Now the reason that we made that decision was because at the time, some of our relatives were very, very anti-medication. They were operating on old or outdated views of ADHD medication, and they had a lot of fear around medication. And we didn't know any better.
And so we thought we're going to try everything else first. So we threw everything at it. We were doing OT, we were doing speech therapy, we did the RPA diet, we did the GAPS diet, we saw an integrative pediatrician, we made, we did neurofeedback therapy. We did everything. We were trying everything as much as possible first before presenting our child with the option of medication. And it was exhausting. It...
some of it was very, very helpful for him and definitely things that we would advise and would have done anyway. But ultimately we still came to the crossroads of needing medication to assist our child. And we were getting so much pressure. We were getting pressure from school because he was really struggling in the classroom. we were getting pressure from our family not to medicate. And so it was getting really just, I was feeling a lot of internal pressure about it. We were wasting a lot of money.
pursuing all sorts of weird and wacky alternative things and really trying so hard to control every aspect of our son's diet and really trying everything and it was exhausting. And so we were receiving a lot of advice, and I'm saying that in speech marks from people who really didn't know anything about ADHD. And now that I've had my formal training, I just like look back at all of that confusion and all of those times that I just ripped myself apart about this decision. And I'm, pretty pissed about it, if I'm honest. Like I'm really, it was just so unhelpful at the time. I can remember even being in a cafe one time and I was talking to the barista about something and ADHD came up because he made a comment that he thought he had ADHD.
And I was like, yeah, my family has ADHD. And he was like, you haven't got them on medication, have you? Like that just, that's like toxic for kids and such a bad thing to do. And I was like, whoa, he gave me advice even without me prompting. Like I was getting ADHD advice from the barista and shamed from a barista. It was wild. It was just a wild time. I like to think that we have come a long way since then. I mean, this was, you know, this was a long time ago and I like to think that we have perhaps grown a little bit as a society and we're not doing that, but I know it still happens and it can be really intense for families to navigate. A lot of advice from people that don't know anything or have an outdated model or, or outdated perception about ADHD and ADHD medication in particular. And it was all kind of coming to a head. We were trying so much. We were really reaching our threshold as a family and-
We were still really unsure and confused about the medication piece. And that's why I wanted to do this episode because I feel like it is one of those questions that people come to me a lot asking, you know, obviously I can't advise medically and they really grappling with the decision about whether medication is the right thing for their child. And I wanted to reassure everyone that this is a process that everyone takes really seriously. People don't jump to medication without really considering whether it's the right thing for their child. And without having the support of the qualified pediatrician or the qualified psychiatrist, it's not one that, you know, we should just make assumptions about. Like we shouldn't listen to other people that aren't qualified in that space or take medical advice from people that aren't qualified. But I wanted to share a little bit about what my family went through because I think it normalizes the struggle that a lot of people feel when it comes to grappling with medication.
So the turning point for me wasn't through reading the studies and through reading the medical evidence and through talking to my doctor. The actual turning point for me and my family was when in a very, very vulnerable moment, my beautiful husband, who has really extreme ADHD, there's no way I call him my resident cyclone, lovable resident cyclone, he disclosed to me at a vulnerable moment that he wished he'd had been given the option of medication. Now he wasn't medicated. He had a really, really rough time in school. He was given extensive OT therapy as for treatment of his ADHD. They had the diagnosis and there was, I mean, there was no mistaking it, but he hadn't been ever presented with the option of medication. And he disclosed to me that he wished he hadn't been. And that was kind of my turning point and something that has been echoed from a lot of adults that I've worked with that they wish that they had have known a little bit more about ADHD and they wish they had have been given the option. And so that was my turning point for my kids. was like, okay, I've got a full grown adult here who's wishing that he had have been given that option. So I'm going to present that option to my children. And I can't, know, obviously this shouldn't influence your decision. That's just a little bit about what made me consider medication as an option. So we were trying everything and.
We still weren't getting, life was still really hard for my kids and I definitely wanted to make it easier for them. And then the second big realization that we had as a family is that trying medication ultimately wasn't enough. Terrifying. So medication is something that we'd held back and then we realized that it wasn't enough, that we still had to do our, we had to do our parenting stuff. We had to do executive function skill training and that medication wasn't the silver bullet that perhaps we thought it was going to be, and it wasn't enough. So let's talk about what ADHD medication is actually doing. Before we talk about whether to medicate, let's talk about ADHD, what ADHD medication actually does. So ADHD is a neurodevelopmental difference. It's not a behavior problem. The ADHD brain has lower levels of dopamine and neuroepidrine the neurotransmitters that regulate attention, impulse control, working memory and other executive functions. So we have the ADHD stimulant medication class. This is things like Ritalin and Concerta and then the amphetamine based ones like Vyvanse and Adderall. So they all work by increasing the availability of those neurotransmitters in the brain. So they are not sedatives. They do not make your child docile. When they work properly, they help the brain regulate itself more effectively, which means your child can access the thinking skills and attention and impulse control and other executive functions that are always there, but just a little bit harder to reach because of those neurotransmitters. So this is a bit of a process and your child's developmental pediatrician or your child's psychologist has a set protocol that they will work through to try and find the right medication and the right dosage and the right time of day for your child's medication. And that's something that I strongly suggests that you work through with your child's professional because it can take a, it's a bit of trial and error on how that works. So that's how that process works. The next part we need to consider is what does the research actually tell us about medication? Let's look at the evidence because there's a lot of it and a lot of it gets misrepresented. So let's look at the MTA study first. So the largest and most comprehensive study of ADHD treatment is the multimold modal treatment study of children with ADHD known as the MTA study. It was funded by the National Institute of Health in the United States and followed over 570 children across 14 months. The finding that consistently gets cited is medication management was significantly more effective than behavioral therapy alone for managing core ADHD symptoms, including inattention, hyperactivity and impulsivity. But here's what often gets left out.
The combination of medication and behaviour therapy produced the best overall outcomes, particularly in areas like academic achievement, social skills, parent-child relationships and anxiety. So medication alone didn't get parents there. Both together did. So when we go just medication or just behavioural therapy, neither had the effect. It was when we did both together that we got the best outcome. So that's not a small distinction. That is everything. Okay, so next let's talk about effectiveness. And this comes from the Lancet Psychiatry, which was published in 2018 and it surveyed over 26,000 participants. Across the research, stimulant medication was effective for approximately 70 to 80 % of children with ADHD. Now that's not a hundred percent.
It means that some children do not respond well or respond better to non-stimulant alternatives. And it means that the work of finding what works for your child is the real work. In 2025, longitude MRI studies found something worth sitting with. Children who started ADHD medication before the age of 12 showed measurable increases in frontal lobe volume. The region responsible for attention, impulse control and executive function. Children who started medication after 12 showed no equivalent structural changes. What this suggests is that timings may matter, that the developing brain in those early years may be more responsive to medication in ways that go beyond symptom management. This research is still emerging and no single study is the final word.
But it adds to the growing body of evidence that when medication is the right choice, earlier may be more beneficial than later. Next, let's talk about long-term studies. A long-term Swedish register study published in JAMA Psychiatry found that ADHD medication was associated with significantly reduced rates of serious transport accidents, criminal activity, and substance use disorders.
So not because medication fixes the person, because the brain can actually regulate itself more effectively, outcomes across life demands improve. research also shows that improved academic outcomes, lower rates of depression and anxiety, and better social functioning in children who receive consistent, well-monitored medication treatment. So basically that old rumor of like, if we give our children a stimulant medication that they'll somehow turn them into a drug addict, which is, I don't know, it's such an outdated thing. We've actually shown the opposite, that children who receive medication treatment actually have better outcomes and have reduced instances of those things. Let's talk about side effects. This is a question every parent is holding and it deserves a real answer. The most common reported side effects of stimulant medication include reduced appetite difficulty falling asleep, and in some children headaches and stomach aches. These are typically dose dependent, meaning they often improve with dosage adjustments. There's also been significant research in the question of growth. So a long-term study published in the Journal of Child Psychology and Psychiatry found a small statistically significant reduction in height velocity in the first two years of treatment. But this difference largely resolved over time with no significant impact on final adult height.
Cardiovascular concerns are sometimes also raised. The current evidence does not support a meaningful risk for healthy children with no pre-existing heart conditions. Your pediatrician will screen for this. What this tells us is that the side effects are real and they do matter. They are also, in most cases, very manageable. And they are weighed against the real cost of untreated ADHD academically, socially, emotionally, and long-term.
Next, here are five questions to ask before you decide to offer medication as an option. Okay. So you've heard the research. Now here is what I want to give you a practical framework for the conversation with your doctor and for a conversation in your own head. These are the five questions every parent should be asking. Question one, how significant is ADHD impacting my child right now?
So medication is generally recommended when ADHD symptoms are causing significant impairment at school, at home, socially or emotionally. The Australian clinical practice guidelines recommend that for children over six, medication should be considered when the impact is moderate to severe, particularly when non-medication strategies alone have not been sufficient. So if your child is struggling significantly and consistently, that context really matters. Question two.
What non-medication strategies are already in place? For children under six, Australian and international guidelines strongly recommend behaviour-based interventions first. So things like parent training, routine building, school support and environmental adjustments are not just second best, they are foundational. And they work best alongside medication when both are in place. This is why I do the work that I'm doing.
This stuff needs to be set up at a parent level, at a school level, and if you haven't yet checked out my website, please do. This is what we specialize in. If you haven't yet built consistent family systems and ADHD informed routines and rhythms, this is worth doing regardless whether you choose medication or not. Question number three, have we trialed medication under proper supervision? So a medication trial is not a lifetime commitment.
It is information, trialing medication carefully with the right medical support and clear observation criteria tells you how your child will respond. And that response is data, not a verdict. If you try it and it's not right, well, you can work with your professional and stop it. If it helps, then you know, either way, you know more than you did. And often I feel that parents feel, and this is certainly what I felt, that they're going to have to be on medication for the rest of their life. It's not always the case.
My son is out of school now, my eldest son is out of school now and he doesn't take medication to go to his job because he loves his job. It's super active and he finds he doesn't need it. So just because they're on it now doesn't necessarily mean that they always have to. He might have it again when he goes to TAFE. It's completely up to him. And now he knows that it's an option for him. So I let him decide that. Question four, what does my child need right now? Not what do you fear? This is the hardest question and it's the most important one.
A lot of the resistance parents feel around medication is about what it means to them, that they've somehow failed, that they're taking an easy road, that they're changing their child somehow. But here is what I want to offer you. Choosing medication when it is the right choice is not taking the easy road. It is choosing your child's access to learning, connection and quality of life over your own discomfort with the decision. And not choosing it?
when your child is struggling significantly and the evidence supports it is also a choice with consequences worth examining honestly. Question five. Do I have the right medical team? This matters more than most parents realize. The right pediatrician or child psychiatrist does not pressure, rush or diminish your questions. They examine the options, they monitor carefully.
They adjust thoughtfully and they treat you as a partner in the process. If you do not feel heard by your medical team, find another one. You are allowed to do that. Here is the thing I've seen in families I work with. The medication decision doesn't exist in a vacuum. Parents who are trying to make this decision while also managing the chaos of family life and morning meltdowns and school emails and homework battles, the emotional dysregulation.
They don't have the head space to think clearly. Everything feels equally urgent and equally overwhelming. That's not a knowledge problem. That's a systems problem. If you're feeling really overwhelmed by your family life at the moment, we can support you with that. The ADHD family quest is a structured practical pathway for families navigating ADHD. It gives you a roadmap, the routines, the clarity to move from reactive to responsive. We're looking at the parent and the family level from chaotic to confidence, not with a list of tips, but with real systems built around how your family actually works. When your home has a foundation, every decision, including this one, becomes clearer. You can find more and join the wait list for the quest at thefunctionalfamily.com. I want to flag something really clearly if you're sitting in this fear of making this decision about whether medication is right for your child. You are not a bad parent for considering medication.
You are not a bad parent for not being ready to trial medication either. You are a parent who is trying to make the best possible decision for your child with incomplete information in an emotionally loaded moment. That is not something to be ashamed of. That is something to be supported through. So look at the research. Take those five questions. Take them to your doctor. Take them to your partner. Take them to your own quiet space.
and make the decision that is right for your child in this season with the information that you have. That is all that we can do as parents. That is enough. I'll see you in the next episode. Thanks for listening to the ADHD Families podcast. My mission is to help you build a family life that isn't just managed, but truly joyful. If you're with me on that mission, please share this episode to help us reach more parents.
Don't forget to subscribe and leave a review. It's a small act that makes a massive impact. And it also makes me do a little happy dance. For more support and strategies, find us over at thefunctionalfamily.com. I am in your corner. See you next time.
